cheez_burger Admin
Posts : 315 WL Points : 130748 Join date : 2010-02-20 Age : 30 Location : Wandering around in Wonderland (Tis what I do best)
| Subject: Running With Wolves: Part Two Thu Jul 15, 2010 11:47 am | |
| As I hurried down the hallway, I felt a burning hand on my shoulder from behind. I knew who it was without having to look, but I just couldn't stop myself. As I looked into his deep brown eyes, it hit me. The eyes... the dark skin.... "Jacob?!" I said, not believing this was the same skinny, jumbled kid I'd known when I was little. "I was wondering when you'd come around." He smiled again, trapping me in a blinding white light. As we walked out of the big doors to the school, he stopped. "Why don't you tell your dad you're coming home with me today...He knows who I am. I want you to come and see the old place again." He said, the corners of his mouth twisting up. He studied me again, and I realized he was waiting for an answer. "Oh. Yeah, sure. Just drop me off real fast and I'll tell him." "Perfect." He beamed, giving another blinding smile. As we got in his old truck, I noted how almost everything around him smelled like woods and grass. I took a deep breath, and it was comforting. We drove along the twisted road to my little house, and all he really did was stare at me. It wasn't a wow-your-sooo-pretty stare it was like he had to...like he had to stare at me to live. "Make it quick," He laughed. "I don't have all day." I walked up the short walkway and cracked open the door. "Hey dad, I'm gonna go home with Jacob today." I said, knowing he was probably cooking for mom. "Jacob? Jacob who? Jacob Black?" He called. "Yeah. The kid I used to hang out with when I was little." I chuckled. "Oh him! Stay as long as you want. Hell, your mom and I have plans, you can sleep over there for all I care." He laughed. I said goodbye and made my way back to the truck, where Jacob was waiting for me. "Hope you like pizza," He grinned. "'Cuz that's what we're having for dinner." "Pizza's perfect." I smiled, and we took off down the road to his house on the reservation, where, though I didn't know it then, I would find out who I was.
Last edited by cheez_burger on Thu Jul 15, 2010 2:30 pm; edited 1 time in total | |
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Tobi-chan Admin
Posts : 360 WL Points : 30037 Join date : 2010-04-29 Age : 30 Location : Looking for a way out of Purgatory.
| Subject: Re: Running With Wolves: Part Two Thu Jul 15, 2010 1:06 pm | |
| Excellent Cheez-chama...XD And I see you took my advice~ That means a lot to me~! Thanks to you guys, though, Jacob was in my dreams...And he stole Gary Oldman from me O.o It's sad, but true...although, I think I WAS Gary at one point...An'way, all you need here is a bit more action, to space things out a bit. It's like BAM dialogue BAM more dialogue. Ya' need to move around more or something...And in the line, "Jacob?!" I said...Well, you asked it, not said it. Or maybe blurted or shouted in disbelief or something. Other than that, it seems pretty perfect to me~! Another great installment~ But...I'm sensing some tragedy in this so far seamless love-story...After all, maybe there was something more to their past...a fight, an argument, whatever. And she still doesn't know he's a woofie shape-shifter~ Boy should that be fun. ~Tobi~ | |
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Arrow Instructor
Posts : 122 WL Points : 29488 Join date : 2010-02-22 Age : 27 Location : Stalking my next prey >:)
| Subject: MEOW Sat Jul 17, 2010 6:40 pm | |
| Fantastic! Speechles! Write More! | |
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| Subject: Re: Running With Wolves: Part Two | |
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