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 Running With Wolves: Part Three

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cheez_burger
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cheez_burger


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Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty
PostSubject: Running With Wolves: Part Three   Running With Wolves: Part Three EmptyThu Jul 15, 2010 2:46 pm

As we pulled into the gravel drive leading to his house, I looked at all the parts of cars and junk bikes laying outside Jake's garage. As I looked at the rusty fenders, I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. Looking over toward the forest, I saw five guys, all about Jake's age, in cutoffs with no shirts. They were laughing and shouting at Jake, and I looked over to see him smiling at something, probably an inside joke. He told them he'd be out later when they shouted something about unfinished business, and we headed into the garage.
"Stay here, I gotta call the pizza place." He murmered. "And try not to kill yourself with the screwdrivers."
"There's only so mush a girl can resist." I laughed. He trodded through the door leading to his kitchen, and I looked around. I saw two motorbikes leaned up against the wood-paneled wall, aboviosly his latest project, with tools lying around them. My eyes drifted to the various tool boxes, all a deep red. And in the corner, he had a stack of clothes, folded and in a semi-neat pile. Out here? I felt my brow furrow in confusion, and then heard his voice.
"Gonna be here in 20 minutes." He sighed. He saw me staring at the clothes and laughed. "Wondering why I've got clothes in the garage?" He asked. I nodded slightly.
"You'll find out soon enough. Just hang around here." I ignored the mystery to the comment, and went to go sit in one of the folded chairs by the bikes. He sat down next to me and picked up a wrench, handing it to me. Then, he got one of his own.
"While you're here, you might as well make yourself useful."
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NikkiSwift
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NikkiSwift


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Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty
PostSubject: Re: Running With Wolves: Part Three   Running With Wolves: Part Three EmptyThu Jul 15, 2010 8:37 pm

Wow, girl! This is so awesome! I was so happy to see you didn't repeat words like said and 'yeah'. He he. . . I'm loving this fanfic so far.
Keep it up! We Taylor and Jacob fans. . . . Well, we take our man VERY seriously.
~Nikki
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Arrow
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Location : Stalking my next prey >:)

Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty
PostSubject: Write More!!!!!   Running With Wolves: Part Three EmptySat Jul 17, 2010 6:49 pm

WRITE MORE
WRITE MORE
WRITE MORE
WRITE MORE
WRITE MORE
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Tobi-chan
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Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty
PostSubject: Re: Running With Wolves: Part Three   Running With Wolves: Part Three EmptySat Jul 17, 2010 8:13 pm

Very Happy Goodie, cheez-chama, goodie~! A few gramatical errors are immediately obvious, though. First off..."There's only so MUSH a girl can resist," should be, "There's only so MUCH a girl can resist,"~! That's a funny typo, though...XD Okay, and then, "I saw two motorbikes leaned up against the wooden wall, ABOVIOUSLY his latest project, with tools lying around them." That's not how you spell it....it's actually OBVIOUSLY. Now, don't stare at that word for too long or you'll hurt yourself. XD I speak from experience...And you could say the motorbikes were LEANING against the wooden wall, rather than leaned up, which sounds weird to me...

Otherwise, I'm really liking where you're taking this plotline. But with the discovery of Jacob's little furry problem (XD), arises a new problem, as far as plot is concerned. How will she take the news? I believe that authors will generally make their character accepting, but she could also freak out for a bit. Then again, if she's known him for that long, it's unlikely...It's still an option, though~! And a curious one at that~!

~Tobi~
This story has much much-ness so far~! Keep it up~!
Like a Star @ heaven alien Like a Star @ heaven Alienz...
clown MANA?! Shocked
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grace1096
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Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty
PostSubject: Re: Running With Wolves: Part Three   Running With Wolves: Part Three EmptyMon Jul 19, 2010 9:40 pm

Mmmm... Jacob Black rox my sox.

KEEP WRITING, GURL!!!

~Grace1096
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Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty
PostSubject: Re: Running With Wolves: Part Three   Running With Wolves: Part Three Empty

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Running With Wolves: Part Three
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» Running With Wolves: Part Two
» Running With Wolves: Part Four
» Running With Wolves: Part Five
» Running With Wolves: Part One (A Jacob Black fanfic)
» Alone, part 4

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